Self Love is Self Preservation
After five weeks of motherhood, I understand why housewives could order heroin from the Sears & Roebuck Catalog and have it delivered directly to their home. At the turn of the 19th century, it was marketed to them including “an ornamented carrying case” and readily available. Even over 100 years ago women required a mental break from the demanding job of being homemakers and mothers. Let’s be honest this is difficult stuff! Maintaining a home is hard enough, not to mention a newborn who eats every two to three hours 24/7. How is that even humanly possible for a mom?! Let’s be clear-by no means am I advocating drug use-especially heroin-I am only making the point that women have always sought out an escape. There has to be a coping mechanism for not only what is happening to the body, but the mind as you develop an unparalleled relationship with the human life you brought into the world. Some people may turn to a vice for distraction. But there is always the option to indulge in the things that make you happy, connect with your center, and practice serious self-love throughout the journey.
Self love goes hand in hand with mental well-being. Checking in with your stress levels and understanding your triggers is a great starting point. What does modern day mental maintenance look like for you? Right now- five weeks postpartum-the concept is difficult to grasp for me. I imagine this is the time I should be leaning into it the most. Also remember whatever state of mind you are currently in, it is amplified by the pandemic. We are in the second year and everyone is exhausted! It’s important to acknowledge that the entire globe is in crisis right now and you have to find your own niche of healing.
This is the perfect month to focus on self-love for mental elevation. Just as everyone became enamored with Valentines Day, it never hurts to focus on falling in love with yourself again. This is a great move whether you are single or involved. Self-love took a turn for me when I realized it is partially dependent on what I put in my body. It could not just be an external endeavor. But how do you start the journey? I began by eliminating everything that went into the body with the exception of water, fruits and vegetables. A 30-day detox! The Herban Brand had powdered, whole food blends that worked phenomenally with my detox. These dehydrated vegetables and fruits really aided my internal process. Everyday the juice or smoothie I created was different. Because I’m so active, I also started to use protein powder with different fruits to maintain my strength. I had to make sure that the protein powder was gluten-free and dairy free; there can often be a lot of additives! I aimed to drink a gallon of water a day, although I’m not actually sure that I reached that lofty goal. Each week gave me a different feeling of clarity.
My 30-day detox was followed by incrementally adding foods one genre at a time to observe the effect on the body and digestive system. For instance, one week eat grains, the next week add meat, the next perhaps include dairy and so on and so forth. Journaling can really help to note how you feel, how your skin looks and what your gut health and energy level is like. With these simple acts of self love, you can be more productive in life because food ailments are not holding you back. Stomach issues can make or break a good evening -and I’m sure we have all experienced that! Taking control of what you eat is important. The way you feel is contingent on what you put in your mouth-what a simple & novel concept!
Want to start a cleanse of your own?
To enhance your self-love journey, you can also try auditory stimulation. Listen to something uplifting or new. Want to try out meditation? Check out this link. Another idea is connecting with something you were deeply in love with in the past. In my pandemic fatigue, I've found solace in the things that I used to love as a child, teenager or young adult. When the quarantine raged on, old music was the place where I found a break from the depression of isolation that we all faced. If the Miseducation of Lauryn Hill can’t bring me happiness, nothing can! I refound myself in lyrics that were lost in my mind, but familiar to the heart. Self love can be indulging in something that is reminiscent, nostalgic & comforting.
By the time I finished writing this feature, I decided to take my own advice and counter current moping-I am going to make an appointment for a yoni steam and massage with hot stones at the Laya Center. In addition I’ll commit to a new home regimen for skincare as I embark on month two of postpartum-in-a-pandemic. I deserve it! The body requires maintenance just like your car or an update on the phone. Pay attention to your interior as much as your exterior. And remember you don’t need to find a reason to do something good for yourself because self love is self preservation!
